Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 9: Think Social
July-August 2009 issue
© 2009
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

Using Language to Relate to Others

In previous columns we explored the vital role that thinking about the people we are communicating with plays in successful interactions. How we relate to people is based on what we know about them: from prior memories (our “people files”) and through cues from the current situation. We also explored that we “think with our eyes” to assess a social situation. We watch others’ eyes to track what they may be thinking about (based on what they are looking at) and we also use our own eyes to provide social cues that we are attending to what is being said. The fourth and last step of communication relates to how we use the information gained from the other steps to relate to our communication partner(s). Interestingly, it is only at this last step that we introduce language!

It is important to note that our language-based communication strategies vary greatly from one situation to another. Stop and think for a minute about how our social language varies. We use one communication style when answering a teacher’s question in a classroom, and another very different style when having a serious problem-solving discussion, and an entirely different style of conversation when hanging out with peers. Each situation has its own “communication personality” and associated “hidden rules” of communication. That said, no matter what the situation, the people who communicate most effectively with others monitor and adjust their language to demonstrate they are thinking about their communication partner. Those who speak, but only seem to be thinking about themselves or their own interests, quickly find it difficult to find people willing to talk to them.

The Importance of Informal Dynamic Assessments

By Michelle Garcia Winner & Pamela J. Crooke
(c) Autism News of Orange County - Summer 2009

While most of us engage in social interaction/regulation intuitively, many students with social learning challenges who have good to excellent language and cognition (e.g., High Functioning Autism, Pervasive Developmental Disorder-Not Otherwise Specified, Asperger Syndrome and/or Attention Deficit Disorder) are weak in their ability to think about how we think socially. They also often lag behind their peers in the development of their social relationship skills. Professionals may regard this higher functioning group as being "quirky" with some level of "social skill problems," but struggle when determining whether or not these students should qualify for specialized services in our schools, given that they may demonstrate strong academic knowledge. Nonetheless, the peer group is generally critical of how these students relate and may actively reject those who don't fit in. Furthermore, the deeper social learning challenges faced by this group may have an impact on how they interpret and respond to academic lessons that require social knowledge, such as reading comprehension of literature, written expression of essays, organizational skills and participating in peer-based (less structured) work groups. (Westby, 1985; Winner, 2000)

Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 8: Think Social
March-April 2009 issue
© 2009
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

Apparently within the autism community, the eyes have it. Peruse 10 different IEPs and you'll probably find goals or objectives involving eye contact on every one.

"Mary will make eye contact when conversing in class."

"George will respond to the command, ‘Look at me" appropriately 9 out of 10 times."

"Grace will wave and make eye-contact when saying ‘hello' to her teacher each morning."

Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 7: Think Social
Jan-Feb 2009 issue
© 2009
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

Caleb is a 23-year-old "bright" young man with Asperger's Syndrome who is particularly gifted in math. He recently participated in a social thinking assessment at our clinic. Caleb recognized and acknowledged he has never been able to figure out how to be perceived as "friendly" when around others, but he sincerely desires to have friends to hang out with and learn what he can do to bring this about.

Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 6: Think Social
Nov-Dec 2008 issue
Copyright©2008
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

In previous columns, we have explored the overall meaning behind the 4 Steps of Communication and learned that communication is not one act, but a symphony of thoughts and related actions synchronized in time. We start by thinking about those around us and in what way we may desire to communicate (or not) with them. In this column we move to Step 2 of communication: establishing physical presence, and the role it plays in connecting emotionally with others during face-to-face interactions.

Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 3: Think Social
May-June 2008 issue
Copyright©2008
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

Last time we discussed the first of the 4 Steps of Communication: Thinking about the person with whom we communicate. In this column we explore concrete strategies related to this step. In future columns we'll tackle the remaining steps of communication: establishing and maintaining a physical presence, thinking with your eyes, and using language to relate to others.

Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 2: Think Social
March-April 2008
Copyright©2008
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

Our friends are people who make us feel good about ourselves. While this is a simple truth, creating those friendships is a complex process, especially for individuals with ASD, with their pervasive social learning challenges.

Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 3: Think Social
May-June 2008 issue
Copyright©2008
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

People think that if something feels easy to do, the mechanisms behind it must be simple.
-Cosmides

Early on in childhood development, most individuals learn to coordinate their own body and mind, as well as interpret the words and actions of others to participate with increasing sophistication in the act of communication. It just comes to us. Yet these same skills don't develop intuitively for our students with social learning challenges, and we therefore step in to teach them to communicate. Most often, however, we sit students around a table in a therapy room, offering instruction and practice opportunities to rehearse what they should say to each other to be polite or "pro-social." Sometimes we overlook the obvious.

Originally published by Autism Asperger's Digest Magazine
Column 1: Think Social
January-February 2008
Copyright©2008
Written by: Michelle Garcia Winner

Ten to fifteen years ago those of us working in the field of autism spectrum disorders were just getting our arms around social skills. It was new to us: the fact that kids with ASD didn't learn by watching others, didn't understand that different people had different reactions to the world around them, and that certain skills we all seemed to learn by osmosis (like how to ask a child to play or share a toy, or what not to say to the teacher) would need to be concretely, patiently, and repetitiously taught to these kids.

Barry M. Prizant, Ph.D., CCC-SLP
Center for the Study of Human Development,
Brown University, Providence, RI

The purpose of this document is to set the record straight about often stated claims regarding ABA vs. other treatment and educational approaches for children with ASD. A small group of the many fine professionals in Applied Behavior Analysis have espoused an "ABA only" approach for children with ASD, and make treatment and educational recommendations conveying this message to families and agencies serving children. Many experienced professionals and parents have become increasingly concerned about such statements made by practitioners and proponents of ABA that are either inaccurate or half-truths, since they convey spurious information to families that is not supported by the most current research and practice. When this occurs it can result in confusion for families and mistrust of professionals, who do not support ABA as the "only" effective approach, thereby undermining the critically important parent-professional partnerships that underlie successful collaboration.